April Fool's


Oh I love eavesdropping on the conversations between Soccer Boy and Buddha Boy! Lately they have been discussing spirituality, and they have very different views regarding how to talk to and listen to God. 

Buddha Boy is very structured and has spent a lot of time in Bible Study groups, is the only one in our family who gets up and is ready on time to attend Mass- he goes by himself- and very steadfastly adheres to the traditional Catholic approach of reading the Bible and trying to follow its teachings to the best of his ability.  He is confident and secure in his beliefs and is not easily swayed by the judgments and expectations of others. A good way to describe Buddha Boy is stoic, sturdy and steadfast. 

Soccer Boy is quite the opposite. His mind is lightening quick and wide open at this time in his life. He is having epiphanies and feeling very inspired to learn from his college mentor who he met in his Monday management class. Soccer Boy believes that God has been speaking the Truth to him through people, and he is very excited about it. He feels that he grasps concepts that the rest of us regular traditional folks miss, and in his youthful arrogance, he alludes that we don't have the capacity to understand these mystical concepts. A good way to describe Soccer Boy is emotional, efficacious and erratic. 

The conversations are priceless, and I wish I had the wherewithal to record them! They go something like this- I will refer to Soccer Boy as SB and Buddha Boy as BB

SB- I talk to God everyday
BB- How do you know if you're talking with God or the Devil?
SB-Because I have talked with the Devil in the past and I have the experience of knowing the difference between God and the Devil
BB- How do you know it's not just your subconscious because lots of people talk to themselves
SB- I know it's coming from outside of me because I get answers
BB- I think you are being influenced by your substance abuse
SB- You are just an unplugged computer who is unwilling and incapable of learning. Moron!
BB- I've already learned enough of how I don't want to be from you. You're no role model for me. 
SB- That's because you're too stupid to learn. 
BB-I'm willing to learn from almost anyone but you -for example my philosophy teacher. I have a fine line of respect and trust and once that's broken it's nearly irreversible. 

Then Soccer Boy came to the kitchen because I wanted to hear what God was telling him.

Ill refer to myself as MG for Mom Girl. 

MG- So can you give me an example of one of your conversations with God?
SB-Well it's hard to put into words, but what I've come to realize is that we get what we want in life. What I mean is that what you believe is what you receive. Take you for example. You're often saying, " I can't this and I can't that" and then it's true for you. You can't! How about saying, "I can!"  You don't need to read your self-help books to learn this!
MG- So, you believe that anyone can do most anything?
SB- Yes!
MG- Well what about all those people born into severe poverty compounded with severe physical disabilities- you believe they can overcome their obstacles by believing them away?
SB- Sigh- I've asked about this. I don't know why some people are born into these situations, but generally speaking, I believe that our thoughts do greatly influence our experience- for better or for worse. 
MG- I definitely agree with that. 
SB- What is one major difference between humans and animals?
MG- You mean besides an opposable thumb? Reasoning. 
SB- Close but that's not it. Ill give you a hint- it begins with a "P"
MG- Passion? Patience? Persistence?
SB- Come on!! Think! You want answers without thinking!
MG- The ability to prioritize?
SB- Bingo! We can prioritize and choose what we will do. Animals just do. 
MG- Interesting
SB- Do you believe that our life on this planet is it?
MG- No. I believe there is much more. 
SB-I go back to the quote, " We are not human beings having a spiritual experience- but we are spiritual beings having a human experience."
MG- Yes I have heard that, and I agree. 
SB- But you seem to have settled in life. You could be so much more than you are. 
MG- More in what way? Earning more money? Driving a fancy car?
SB- Don't you wish you had more money? Wouldn't you like to travel more?
MG- Well sure, but my life is not all about me. And at this point in my life I am very content. I have so much to be thankful for- health, family, security, job which I enjoy, free time to read and walk. I don't feel like an underachiever. I don't question my purpose so much anymore, but boy did I used to. That questioning often led to a feeling of anxiety.  Of not knowing the next step and feeling like I was never doing was I was supposed to be doing quite right. 
SB- Well what do you want from life?
MG- I want to continue to study and learn about the things which interest me. 
SB-Well that's a great answer. 

And then he ran out of time and had to finish his Power Point in a big hurry. I can't wait to ask him what he wants out of life. Buddha Boy claims to know his purpose. He believes his life's purpose is to enforce peace by stopping genocide. He will take orders from those who know more than he and work towards the greater good. 

Pretty heavy stuff for a Monday night! I can't wait for the next conversation!


Breakfast Lasagna

Oven 350

Cooked Hash Browns, Tater Tots, or Potato Patties- enough to line the bottom of your baking dish

2 Pounds o Sage Sausage cooked-fat drained

2 cups of shredded cheddar cheese

8 eggs

2 cups milk

Salt, pepper, garlic, sage

This is an easy cheesy crowd pleaser.

1) Place the cooked potatoes on the bottom of your large 9 x 13 or a bit bigger lasagna dish.

2) Top with crumbled sausage. ( you can cook this the night before )

3) Sprinkle with a bit of shredded cheddar.

4) Pour egg mixture over.

5) Top with remaining cheese.

6) Spray foil with Pam and cover. Bake for an hour.

Here begins the Book of the Tales of Canterbury

When April with his showers sweet with fruit

The drought of March has pierced unto the root

And bathed each vein with liquor that has power

To generate therein and sire the flower;

When Zephyr also has, with his sweet breath,

Quickened again, in every holt and heath,

The tender shoots and buds, and the young sun

Into the Ram one half his course has run,

And many little birds make melody

That sleep through all the night with open eye

(So Nature pricks them on to ramp and rage)-

Then do folk long to go on pilgrimage,

And palmers to go seeking out strange strands,

To distant shrines well known in sundry lands.

And specially from every shire's end

Of England they to Canterbury wend,

The holy blessed martyr there to seek

Who helped them when they lay so ill and weal

Befell that, in that season, on a day

In Southwark, at the Tabard, as I lay

Ready to start upon my pilgrimage

To Canterbury, full of devout homage,

There came at nightfall to that hostelry

Some nine and twenty in a company

Of sundry persons who had chanced to fall

In fellowship, and pilgrims were they all

That toward Canterbury town would ride.

The rooms and stables spacious were and wide,

And well we there were eased, and of the best.

And briefly, when the sun had gone to rest,

So had I spoken with them, every one,

That I was of their fellowship anon,

And made agreement that we'd early rise

To take the road, as you I will apprise.

But none the less, whilst I have time and space,

Before yet farther in this tale I pace,

It seems to me accordant with reason

To inform you of the state of every one

Of all of these, as it appeared to me,

And who they were, and what was their degree,

And even how arrayed there at the inn;

And with a knight thus will I first begin.

A knight there was, and he a worthy man,

Who, from the moment that he first began

To ride about the world, loved chivalry,

Truth, honour, freedom and all courtesy.

Full worthy was he in his liege-lord's war,

And therein had he ridden (none more far)

As well in Christendom as heathenesse,

And honoured everywhere for worthiness.

At Alexandria, he, when it was won;

Full oft the table's roster he'd begun

Above all nations' knights in Prussia.

In Latvia raided he, and Russia,

No christened man so oft of his degree.

In far Granada at the siege was he

Of Algeciras, and in Belmarie.

At Ayas was he and at Satalye

When they were won; and on the Middle Sea

At many a noble meeting chanced to be.

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Next Post date: May 6, 2013
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April 1, 2013

Quotes:

April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four. ~Mark Twain, Pudd'nhead Wilson, 1894

***

April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly. ~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

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Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. ~Chinese Proverb

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Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee,
And I'll forgive Thy great big one on me.
~Robert Frost, "Cluster of Faith," 1962

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He who is born a fool is never cured. ~Proverb

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Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed. ~Mark Twain

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If every fool wore a crown, we should all be kings. ~Welsh Proverb

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I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ~Jack Handey

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We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb

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You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time. ~Abraham Lincoln

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Even the gods love jokes. ~Plato

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The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected. ~Will Rogers

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A man always blames the woman who fools him. In the same way he blames the door he walks into in the dark. ~Henry Louis Mencken

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A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools. ~Douglas Adams

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It is the ability to take a joke, not make one, that proves you have a sense of humor. ~Max Eastman

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Don't give cherries to pigs or advice to fools. ~Irish Proverb

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A sense of humor is the ability to understand a joke-and that the joke is oneself. ~Clifton Paul Fadiman

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It is better to weep with wise men than to laugh with fools. ~Spanish Proverb

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I have great faith in fools - self-confidence, my friends call it. ~Edgar Allan Poe

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The aim of a joke is not to degrade the human being, but to remind him that he is already degraded. ~George Orwell

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Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke? ~Rita Rudner

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Suppose the world were only one of God's jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one? ~George Bernard Shaw

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Real friends are those who, when you feel you've made a fool of yourself, don't feel you've done a permanent job. ~Author Unknown

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One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late. ~Jack Handey

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