Mother's Day 2016
Did you ever notice that the word "Mother" has the word "Other" and then "Her" in it? So a Mother is a Her that cares for others-yes? Well "Mother" also has "Moth" in it, and off the top of my head, I could only think of a few similarities between moths and mothers, namely that we both have antennas and fly at night when necessary.
So Mothers care for others. First we carry them in our womb and then we care for them until we are no more. It never stops. We have a bit of help to get the party started, and then the miracle of life begins. Nine months later, if all goes according to plan, we meet face to face and begin our life-long journey together.
This mother child bond is unlike any other. Our babies are born completely dependent for their every need. We nurture and guide them into independence. Each child arrives with their distinct personality, gifts and challenges.
Take two people- mix up the DNA- the possibilities are endless! As our babies mature into children, tweens, teens, young adults, and hopefully into responsible adults, we do our best to support them. We get to know them as individuals with their own preferences, oftentimes quite different from ours.
It's a slippery slope at times. How are we to encourage without nagging? Teach without taking over? Praise without fostering entitlement? My brood has blossomed into adulthood, and I now have more time to reflect on rearing them. If only I had the wisdom which comes from experience when we first embarked upon this journey..... What would I have done differently? Just a few things .....
First, I would have led more by example instead of with words. Talking the talk is not nearly as effective as walking the walk. The old adage do as I say not as I do is ineffective at best. That other adage, history repeats itself seems far more accurate. I would have listened more and talked much less.I'm still working on that one!
I would have skipped so many of the smaller battles and saved up that energy for the bigger ones that mattered more. Better yet to have avoided the battles altogether, as very little is resolved by power struggles. Learning by consequence, on the other hand, is a fabulous teacher.
Of course there are some consequences which must be avoided at all costs- for example getting hit by a car after running into the street without looking. I believe that is why children are designed to start out small- so that we, as their parents, can easily yank them out of harm's way when the need arises. Once they mature into adulthood, this dynamic changes. We can no longer yank them out of harm's way. We have to pray and have faith that they will make the right decisions. And when they don't, our role is to be there to pick up the pieces and rebuild, hopefully with a better foundation.
I would have had more confidence in my natural parenting abilities and worried less about being politically correct and doing everything "right. Some things are better "left". Every situation is unique. There is no one size fits all.
I think some of the most important things we can teach our children most effectively through example is how to love, show respect, express gratitude, admit defeat with grace, ask for help when needed, assume nothing- instead verify and clarify, be kind, help others unconditionally, work as a team, actively listen with an open mind, learn from the mistakes of others, practice generosity, continue to learn, expect nothing and appreciate everything.
And lastly, it is one of the greatest honors to be blessed with the opportunity to care and nurture our children. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I continue to learn from them each day and for that I am grateful.
Happy Mother's Day to all Mother's, biological, adoptive, step, surrogate, grand, great, and honorary! Love Jewel!
Recipe From One of the Tasty Facebook Videos!
Potato Chicken Bacon Casserole
1 pound bacon cooked and crumbled
1 tbsp paprika
2 tbsp Garlic powder ( I used 1 tbsp granulated garlic )
2 tsp salt
2 tsp black pepper
1/4 cup olive oil
2 tbsp hot sauce
8 diced Red Potatoes
1 pound cubed chicken breast
1/2 cup green onions
2 cups shredded cheddar
Fry the bacon while you are making the sauce and dicing the potatoes and chicken. Set the bacon aside. Mix everything but the cheese and green onions, and place in a 9x13 casserole. Cook at 350 for 1 hour. Remove from oven and top with green onions and the cheddar and bacon. Return to oven for 15 minutes or until the cheese is melted.
This is my new favorite dinner. So yummy!
Oldie but Goodie
THE OLD PHONE ON THE WALL.... HELLO
When I was a young boy, my father had one of the first telephones in our neighborhood.... I remember the polished, old case fastened to the wall. The shiny receiver hung on the side of the box. I was too little to reach the telephone, but used to listen with fascination when my mother talked to it.
Then I discovered that somewhere inside the wonderful device lived an amazing person. Her name was "Information Please" and there was nothing she did not know. Information Please could supply anyone's number and the correct time.
My personal experience with the genie-in-a-bottle came one day while my mother was visiting a neighbor. Amusing myself at the tool bench in the basement, I whacked my finger with a hammer, the pain was terrible, but there seemed no point in crying because there was no one home to give sympathy.
I walked around the house sucking my throbbing finger, finally arriving at the stairway. The telephone! Quickly, I ran for the footstool in the parlor and dragged it to the landing. Climbing up, I unhooked the receiver in the parlor and held it to my ear.
"Information, please" I said into the mouthpiece just above my head.
A click or two and a small clear voice spoke into my ear.
"I hurt my finger..." I wailed into the phone, the tears came readily enough
now that I had an audience.
"Isn't your mother home?" Came the question.
"Nobody's home but me," I blubbered.
"Are you bleeding?" the voice asked.
I replied. "I hit my finger with the hammer and it hurts."
"Can you open the icebox?" she asked.
I said I could.
"Then chip off a little bit of ice and hold it to your finger," said the voice...
After that, I called "Information Please" for everything.. I asked her for
help with my geography, and she told me where Philadelphia was. She helped me with my math.
She told me my pet chipmunk that I had caught in the park just the day before, would eat fruit and nuts..
Then, there was the time Petey, our pet canary, died.. I called,
Information Please," and told her the sad story. She listened, and then said things grown-ups say to soothe a child. But I was not consoled. I asked her, "Why is it that birds should sing so beautifully and bring joy to all families, only to end up as a heap of feathers on the bottom of a cage?"
She must have sensed my deep concern, for she said quietly, " Wayne , always remember that there are other worlds to sing in."
Somehow I felt better.
Another day I was on the telephone, "Information Please."
"Information," said in the now familiar voice. "How do I spell fix?" I asked.
All this took place in a small town in the Pacific Northwest . When I was nine years old, we moved across the country to Boston . I missed my friend very much. "Information Please" belonged in that old wooden box back home and I
somehow never thought of trying the shiny new phone that sat on the table in the hall. As I grew into my teens, the memories of those childhood conversations never really left me.
Often, in moments of doubt and perplexity I would recall the serene sense of security I had then. I appreciated now how patient, understanding, and kind she was to have spent her time on a little boy.
A few years later, on my way west to college, my plane put down in Seattle .. I had about a half-hour or so between planes. I spent 15 minutes or so on the phone with my sister, who lived there now. Then without thinking what I was doing, I dialed my hometown operator and said, "Information Please."
Miraculously, I heard the small, clear voice I knew so well.
I hadn't planned this, but I heard myself saying,
"Could you please tell me how to spell fix?"
There was a long pause. Then came the soft spoken answer, "I guess your finger must have healed by now."
I laughed, "So it's really you," I said. "I wonder if you have any
idea how much you meant to me during that time?"
I wonder," she said, "if you know how much your calls meant to me.
I never had any children and I used to look forward to your calls."
I told her how often I had thought of her over the years and I asked if I could call her again when I came back to visit my sister.
"Please do", she said. "Just ask for Sally."
Three months later I was back in Seattle .. A different voice answered,
I asked for Sally.
"Are you a friend?" she said.
"Yes, a very old friend," I answered.
"I'm sorry to have to tell you this," She said. "Sally had been working part time the last few years because she was sick. She died five weeks ago."
Before I could hang up, she said, "
Wait a minute, did you say your name was Wayne ?" "
Yes." I answered.
"Well, Sally left a message for you.
She wrote it down in case you called.
Let me read it to you."
The note said,
"Tell him there are other worlds to sing in.
He'll know what I mean."
I thanked her and hung up. I knew what Sally meant.
Never underestimate the impression you may make on others.
Whose life have you touched today?
Why not pass this on? I just did.....
Lifting you on eagle's wings.
May you find the joy and peace you long for.
Life is a journey... NOT a guided tour.
I loved this story and just had to pass it on.
Because that's what kindness is. It's not doing something for someone else because they can't, but because you can. ~Andrew Iskander
Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again. ~Og Mandino
If every man's internal care
Were written on his brow,
How many would our pity share
Who raise our envy now?
Kindness is the greatest wisdom. ~Author Unknown
A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. ~Dave Barry, "Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn"
If thou are a master, be sometimes blind; if a servant, sometimes deaf. ~Thomas Fuller
Even when you do not feel big hearted, you can give yourself permission to act that way. ~Lama Willa Miller
Life is short but there is always time for courtesy. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson, Social Aims
Don't cast a shadow on anyone unless you're providing shade. ~Terri Guillemets
If we cannot be clever, we can always be kind. ~Alfred Fripp
To give and then not feel that one has given is the very best of all ways of giving. ~Max Beerbohm
In about the same degree as you are helpful, you will be happy. ~Karl Reiland
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Happy Mother's Day!!
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. ~Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama
If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble. ~Bob Hope
If someone were to pay you ten cents for every kind word you said about people and collect five cents for every unkind word, would you be rich or poor? ~Author unknown, quoted by Jacob M. Braude
Never look down on anybody unless you're helping him up. ~Jesse Jackson
Kindness is just love with its workboots on. ~Author unknown
A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on marble. ~Charles H. Spurgeon
It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice. ~Author unknown
Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you not because they are nice, but because you are. ~Author Unknown
What this world needs is a new kind of army the army of the kind. ~Cleveland Amory
If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. ~Dalai Lama
I always prefer to believe the best of everybody, it saves so much trouble. ~Rudyard Kipling
Don't be yourself be someone a little nicer. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
There is no greater loan than a sympathetic ear. ~Frank Tyger
Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it. ~Author Unknown
A fellow who does things that count, doesn't usually stop to count them. ~Variation of a saying by Albert Einstein
Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for a kindness. ~Seneca
A kind word is like a Spring day. ~Russian Proverb
Kindness is in our power, even when fondness is not. ~Samuel Johnson
There is one word which may serve as a rule of practice for all one's life reciprocity. ~Confucius
Don't wait for people to be friendly, show them how. ~Author Unknown
The most important trip you may take in life is meeting people halfway. ~Henry Boye
When I was young, I admired clever people. Now that I am old, I admire kind people. ~Abraham Joshua Heschel
If we should deal out justice only, in this world, who would escape? No, it is better to be generous, and in the end more profitable, for it gains gratitude for us, and love. ~Mark Twain
Life is mostly froth and bubble,
Two things stand like stone,
Kindness in another's trouble,
Courage in your own.
~Adam Lindsay Gordon
You can't live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you. ~John Wooden
Kindness, like a boomerang, always returns. ~Author Unknown
If those who owe us nothing gave us nothing, how poor we would be. ~Antonio Porchia
You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
By swallowing evil words unsaid, no one has ever harmed his stomach. ~Winston Churchill
The kindest word in all the world is the unkind word, unsaid. ~Author Unknown
The everyday kindness of the back roads more than makes up for the acts of greed in the headlines. ~Charles Kural
Dont let those who take advantage of your generosity stop you from being generous. ~Author Unknown
Be a rainbow in someone elses cloud. ~Maya Angelou
In a world full of people who couldn't care less, be someone who couldn't care more. ~Author unknown
We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak. ~Epictetus
One can pay back the loan of gold, but one dies forever in debt to those who are kind. ~Malayan Proverb
Being considerate of others will take your children further in life than any college degree. ~Marian Wright Edelman
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. ~Leo Buscaglia
Kind hearts are the gardens,
Kind thoughts are the roots,
Kind words are the blossoms,
Kind deeds are the fruits.
~19th century rhyme used in primary schools
A bit of fragrance always clings to the hand that gives roses. ~Chinese Proverb
We always prefer war on our own terms to peace on someone else's. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
Have you had a kindness shown?
Pass it on;
'Twas not given for thee alone,
Pass it on;
Let it travel down the years,
Let it wipe another's tears,
'Til in Heaven the deed appears -
Pass it on.
~Henry Burton, Pass It On
The best way to knock the chip off your neighbor's shoulder is to pat him on the back. ~Author Unknown
Treat each person as if their heart was breaking. More often than not, you will be right. ~David Weedmark
One man cannot hold another man down in the ditch without remaining down in the ditch with him. ~Booker T. Washington
The only people with whom you should try to get even are those who have helped you. ~John E. Southard
Love someone who doesn't deserve it. ~Author Unknown
Kind people are the best kind of people. ~Author Unknown
The more sympathy you give, the less you need. ~Malcolm S. Forbes
There are no traffic jams when you go the extra mile. ~Kenneth McFarland
Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. ~James Matthew Barrie
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